My first opportunity to pray in a group came when some of my fellow high school students and I were standing in a circle, holding hands. The leader told us we could either pray or squeeze the hand of the person next to us. I was a squeezer that day. Since then, I have enjoyed praying and hearing others pray hundreds, if not thousands, of times in both planned and impromptu settings. However, I have learned through my mistakes and the conduct of others that there are certain types of group prayer participants none of us should want to be.
The Sleeper – Colossians 4:2 says, “Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it.” The aim is to remain engaged, even if just listening. Stand if necessary.
The Whisperer – God hears you even if you speak softly, but what about everybody else? If you speak up, the group will more likely be of one mind (Acts 1:14).
The Rambler – Some might fall into this category because they try to pray through everything on the prayer list in one turn, leaving the rest feeling like there is nothing else to ask from the Lord. John Newton was aware of the “ramblers” among us:
The chief fault of some good prayers is that they are too long; not that I think we should pray by the clock, and limit ourselves precisely to a certain number of minutes; but it is better of the two, that the hearers should wish the prayer had been longer, than spend half or a considerable part of the time in wishing it was over. [1]
The Repeater – Certain themes and ideas should get repeated, but this person is praying the exact content that somebody else prayed in the same gathering. Another participant becomes “The Repeater” by saying the same word or phrase over and over (“Oh Lord,” “just,” etc.).
The Preacher – Some use their opportunity to pray as a platform to exhort people in the gathering. “They rather express the Lord’s mind to the people, than the desires of the people to the Lord.” [2] Here are Charles Spurgeon’s thoughts on this:
The friends who were reputed to be “gifted” indulged themselves in public prayer with a review of their own experience, a recapitulation of their creed, an occasional running commentary upon a chapter or Psalm, or even a criticism upon the pastor and his sermons. It was too often quite forgotten that the brother was addressing the Divine Majesty, before whose wisdom a display of our knowledge is impertinence, and before whose glory an attempt at swelling words and pompous periods is little short of profanity; the harangue was evidently intended for man rather than God, and on some occasions did not contain a single petition from beginning to end. We hope that good men are leaving this unhallowed practice, and are beginning to see that sermons and doctrinal disquisitions are miserable substitutes for earnest wrestling prayers, when our place is before the mercy-seat, and our engagement is intercession with the Most High. [3]
The Gossiper – This person often makes an appearance during the time when requests are being shared before the praying begins. Just one example:
“We really need to cry out to God for John. I’m thinking his marriage might be in big trouble.”
“Oh, really, what’s going on?”
“Well, I don’t know for sure, but I saw John and his wife having a serious conversation last week in Pastor Mike’s office, and I remember a few years ago how they went through some real struggles in their marriage.”
The Distracter – What is so important on that phone? Or in that purse? Sadly, now we all want to know!
The Disrespecter – This person talks to God too casually, lacking reverence.
If a man was pleading for his life, or expressing his thanks to the king for a pardon, common sense and decency would teach him a suitableness of manner; and anyone who could not understand his language might know by the sound of his words that he was not making a bargain or telling a story.
How much more, when we speak to the King of kings, should the consideration of his glory and our own vileness, and of the important concerns we are engaged in before him, impress us with an air of seriousness and reverence, and prevent us from speaking to him as if he was altogether such a one as ourselves! The liberty to which we are called by the gospel does not at all encourage such a pertness and familiarity as would be unbecoming to use towards a fellow-worm, who was a little advanced above us in worldly dignity. [4]
The KJVer – I don’t have in mind those who have so many verses of the KJV memorized that the “Thees” and “Thous” naturally spill out. I’m thinking of those who switch to this mode of speaking, or even a more “polished” version of themselves, using extremely formal and studied language perhaps because they think it’s more reverent and what God wants.
(W)e often find that unlettered people who have had little help or no help from books, or rather have not been fettered by them, can pray with an unction and savour in an unpremeditated way, while the prayers of persons of much superior abilities, perhaps even of ministers themselves, are, though accurate and regular, so dry and starched, that they afford little either of pleasure or profit to a spiritual mind. The spirit of prayer is the fruit and token of the Spirit of adoption. [5]
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[1] John Newton, Thoughts on Public Prayer, located at https://www.chapellibrary.org/read/topp, accessed March 21, 2023.
[2] Ibid.
[3] Only a Prayer Meeting, located at https://www.gracegems.org/Spurgeon/only_a_prayer_meeting.htm, accessed March 21, 2023.
[4] Newton.
[5] Ibid.